Mother’s Day reminds us of how we came into this world. It warms our hearts and we smirk in silence whenever we think about this miracle. Our mothers are our reason for being… and our beacon of strength and it is very emotional for this writer to speak about a subject for which we all have in common without turning it personal, and I thank you all for sharing this moment with me. I’m certain I’m not unique in my vulnerability, because all of us are vulnerable when it comes to our moms; except some of us do a very good job of either suppressing it or expressing it in a covert way. Sorry folks… being of sentimental nature… I just can’t.
As I look back on my life, I find myself wondering if I ever thanked her for everything she has done for me. I wonder if I ever really showed her how much I appreciated her for being by my side on my successes, my failures and my defeats. Did I every let her know how much I valued her for teaching me good judgement, courage and honesty? Did I ever really let her know how much I now appreciate her for all the simple things she so unconditionally gave and taught me?
I confess… I don’t think I have… and as I see her aging, I wonder if I will ever be able to place into words what I feel for her everyday. In all honesty, I’m ashamed for believing that this woman would somehow live forever to take my spastic moments and mood swings until I somehow miraculously recovered. She was never obligated to take my crap, but she did… and she did it with patience, kindness and unconditional love.
When you’re a child she walks before you to set an example.
When you’re a teenager she walks behind you to be there should you need her.
When you’re an adult she walks beside you so that you can enjoy life together..
Space and time are too short to write down all the feelings and memories I have shared with her on this journey of life. But I want her to know….
So here goes… Mama, thank you for never neglecting my needs, for always believing in me and never giving up hope that one day things will turn around for your daughter…
If I knew as a child what I know now, then I would never have made things so difficult for you… I know I wasn’t a model child… and I want you to forgive me for this… I should have realized that you always looked out for my best interest even though at the time it may not have seemed so to me. But know this… that even during those moments it was my ego and pride that prevented me from running back into your arms and admitting that you were right.
You planted the seed that I base my life on you are the map I follow with every step. You are my teacher, my mentor, my foundation, my role model, my best friend and nothing on earth can ever surpass the love, respect and honour I feel for you…. Literally… nothing!
Not time, not space Mom and certainly not even death…
We pray for your good health, and I, as well as Johanne and James, love and appreciate you…
Happy Mother’s Day Manoula